Its funny how things have a way of swirling, changing course like a capricious river.. throwing up unexpected stuff.. just when you think you've got it all charted out, the course changes again.. making you rethink.
A few years ago, I was convinced I hate Chennai for its weather ( never could stand humidity), its infamous autos and its extremist lingual pride. I'd come to these studied conclusions based on about 16 hours that I'd spent there. And nothing, but nothing could ever get me to live in the city for any length of time.
I'd never have believed that I'd spend months there, merely on a whim at work. See if I could start from scratch again, at ground zero. See if I could rethink any of the assumptions.
Or that a few months later, I would actually rethink the assumptions. That the weather though unpleasant, could be grinned and berrited, or at any rate AC'd away. That its infamous autos could be avoided. That its insistent choice of language, although by far the most problematic, could at times be ignored, and at others be politely overruled.
What I hadn't quite bargained to find, was its alarming similarity to Delhi, the very characteristics which had built my misandry and the layers of hate, built them good and steady over 2 decades, cemented by the countless dick brushes and boob grabs , cat calls and stares. Of a hate which had somewhat abated, but which Chennai certainly reminded me of again in the last few months.
So when the big bang finally exploded at work yesterday, there was a quiet happiness. There was the joy of being back with nn, of finally finishing the exhausting flights and buses, of being that much closer to the unknown waters. There were bits of regret about the end of some of the fun times we'd had, and the saying of good byes to some really nice colleagues.
But jostling between all those thoughts, was one clear joy, of just returning to Bangalore...